Our losses and how we go through them are all unique. You may have lost a mate, child or friend. You may be experiencing the loss of a divorce or perhaps you have had a sequence of losses. Or, it could be a past lost that you never grieved that is troubling you now. Each journey of grief is unique.
Whatever and however you are grieving, doing this work will lead you to a place where you can embrace your life once again and be open to the gifts yet to come your way.
Here are four key areas of work that will support you on this journey of grieving.
1. Reach out
Reach out to a family member, a friend, a counselor or a grieving group. This is not the time for you to be stoic. You were not meant to be alone during such times. Connecting with others brings gifts of healing that are hard to find in any other way.
2. Take care of yourself
This is the best gift you can give to yourself, and no one can do it for you. Get adequate rest, eat healthy food, enjoy short walks, meditate in the sunlight or just sit and bask in the glow. It gives you strength and will help you be healthier when the grieving process is over. Be gentle with yourself and support your body’s natural healing processes. You are programmed to self-repair and self-improve. Support your body in doing the work it was meant to do.
3. Tame the memory
Don’t resist the memories; rather be with them and honor them. You might find it helpful to share your memories with someone. You can write some of your best memories down and store them in a special box with some of your favorite photos. You will find as time goes by, your memories are less painful. Eventually you will look back with gratitude for the time and experiences you had with your dear one.
4. Do the work
Grieving work comes in many forms. Some find that journaling is helpful; others find that expressing their feelings through painting or other creative work is helpful in processing their grief. Having a safe place to feel the sadness and letting yourself cry helps heal the pain of losing someone dear to you. Walking and just being in nature is healing for many.
Life is moving forward even if you don’t want it to. Doing the work of grieving helps you deal with the pain of loss and the many feelings you experience during such a time, and restores your energy for the next phase of your life.
If you are open and willing to grieve your loss, eventually you will feel more like your old self again. Completely the same? No, loss does change us. As we move through the experience of loss and transition we find amazing gifts like new wisdom, increased compassion and gratitude. These gifts expand us and we move forward in life with more grace and understanding.
