SPRINGBOARD CONNECTIONS

Change and Transition: The Powerful Work of Grieving

Grieving your loss is the most powerful work you can do, supporting the physical, mental and spiritual healing necessary after losing someone you love. And it’s tough work, tougher still because there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Each person moves through the process   differently, and at their own speed.  

Our losses and how we go through them are all unique. You may have lost a mate, child or friend. You may be experiencing the loss of a divorce or perhaps you have had a sequence of losses. Or, it could be a past lost that you never grieved that is troubling you now. Each journey of grief is unique.

Whatever and however you are grieving, doing this work will lead you to a place where you can embrace your life once again and be open to the gifts yet to come your way.

 Here are four key areas of work that will support you on this journey of grieving.

1.   Reach out

Reach out to a family member, a friend, a counselor or a grieving group. This is not the time for you to be stoic. You were not meant to be alone during such times. Connecting with others brings gifts of healing that are hard to find in any other way.

2.   Take care of yourself

This is the best gift you can give to yourself, and no one can do it for you. Get adequate rest, eat healthy food, enjoy short walks, meditate in the sunlight or just sit and bask in the glow. It gives you strength and will help you be healthier when the grieving process is over. Be gentle with yourself and support your body’s natural healing processes. You are programmed to self-repair and self-improve. Support your body in doing the work it was meant to do.

3.   Tame the memory

Don’t resist the memories; rather be with them and honor them. You might find it helpful to share your memories with someone. You can write some of your best memories down and store them in a special box with some of your favorite photos. You will find as time goes by, your memories are less painful. Eventually you will look back with gratitude for the time and experiences you had with your dear one.

4.   Do the work

Grieving work comes in many forms. Some find that journaling is helpful; others find that expressing their feelings through painting or other creative work is helpful in processing their grief. Having a safe place to feel the sadness and letting yourself cry helps heal the pain of losing someone dear to you. Walking and just being in nature is healing for many.

Life is moving forward even if you don’t want it to. Doing the work of grieving helps you deal with the pain of loss and the many feelings you experience during such a time, and restores your energy for the next phase of your life.

If you are open and willing to grieve your loss, eventually you will feel more like your old self again. Completely the same? No, loss does change us. As we move through the experience of loss and transition we find amazing gifts like new wisdom, increased compassion and gratitude. These gifts expand us and we move forward in life with more grace and understanding. 

Important - time & enrollment limited -

Hello Everyone,

 

I want to connect with you today to make sure you are aware of our upcoming teleclass series that begins Wed. March 10, 2010.  Because our class size is limited to 15 participants it's important to act now if you are interested in taking advantage of this opportunity.

 

We just finished a class this week. Ulrika Brattemark, my co-coach for this series, and I were so pleased with the reviews the participants gave us during our last call. They commented on things like: increased self-esteem, accomplishments in work organization and accountability, heighten spiritual awareness, feeling supported through loss and grieving and closer to finding that much needed job.

 

People come seeking support and wanting to experience more satisfaction in a variety of areas in their life. We are always thrilled to see the shifts, growth and camaraderie that builds during our time together in our Circle of Life/Power of Focus Teleclass Series.    Register here  http://www.marlenelockwood.com/circleoflife.html

 

So let me ask you . . .

 

Is your life unfolding with a sense of purpose and meaning? Are you truly delighted by your path? This holistic series can make the difference. With the support of two skilled life coaches, the power of the group and clear tools, you can truly make powerful decisions about where your life is headed and how you intend to live it. By focusing on what actually matters to you, you can prioritize meaningful changes and ensure that you are taking care of yourself along the way. You truly can have the life you want to be living.

 

Who is this retreat for? Anyone ready to make a commitment to living a more purposeful, fulfuilled and balanced life. Join us, enjoy the camaraderie and take the action now to make this your best year yet. I don't want you to read this email in 2011 in the same place you are today. 

 

I've included a recording of my interview with Bill, a previous participant, so you can listen to his experience. Just click on the following link.

Download Bill's testimony MP3 2-16-10-120

 

For more information about the course

To Register for our next course beginning on March 10 click below. http://www.marlenelockwood.com/circleoflife.html

or email me at coach@marlenelockwood.com

 

This is your invitation to join us. We would be thrilled to have you a part of our next group. Come, and find the support and camaraderie to reach your heartfelt goals. Remember, if you are interested sign up now. Our class size is limited to 15.

 

 

How to Deal with Life, Loss and Transition at the Big High School Reunion

I think someone has made a drastic mistake. It just can’t be ++ that many years since I graduated from high school. It's got to be impossible. However, since someone has planned a big shindig (they must have lost their cookies), I think I will go. It would be great to see some of those “old” friends. J 

For some, high school reunions can be particularly unnerving. Why is that? It goes beyond the fact that we have put on a little weight, that the sun has had too much fun on our face, or wondering what there will be to talk about?

Our lives have been full since those many years ago. We are really no longer that person who graduated at seventeen or eighteen. Life has happened – the good and the bad. There have been jobs, lost jobs, crazy jobs. There have been marriage, divorce and new marriages. We’ve had children. Perhaps changed churches or quit going – you name it. Some have lost their mates or even children in death. How do you even begin to tell, or even want to tell, people what’s been happening in your life?

When you haven't seen someone for 25 years (or more), they're bound to want to catch up. There will be questions about the turns your life has taken. We don’t want to be braggers – or worse – whiners. How do you really show up at a reunion and in a few hours communicate any of this? Many of us don’t even want to. As a result the event often feels superficial and full of small talk. Or we feel like we are front and center, under a microscope.

What I’ve experienced is that we all have similar feelings in these kinds of situations. Your painful transitions – even if you don't delve into details – can actually be inspiring and feel supportive to others. We often feel like we are the only ones with such stories, but we’re not. Life has happened to us all. When we come to these occasions with a soft and open heart, sharing only what we feel comfortable to share, and with a strong and accepting listening ear for the stories of others, we come away feeling like it has been a wonderful time.

You know, in many ways I loved my high school years. Yes, there was all the pain of being a teenager, and I wouldn’t want to do it again for love or money. But when you consider that I graduated from the eighth grade with the same fella I started the first grade with – and, there was only two of us in the class, well, things had to go up from there! Going to a high school with many students and with boys taller than me was new and exciting – I do have good memories of my high school years.

But I still have some angst about the reunion, and I do want to look my best. So here’s my plan. I’m going to lose 10 lbs. by the end of April. (I know, not very original.) So, why am I sharing this? Because I need someone to hold me accountable, and writing in my blog does just that for me. I’ll keep you posted along the way . . . no gruesome details, I promise – just the fun progress!

Anyone want to join me? (. . . on the diet, that is.)

Here are a few good high school quotes from the movies. If you have others please share. Or write and tell me your experience at your last high school reunion.

 

“It's not the years honey, it's the mileage.”
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) – Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford)

“High school, those are your prime suffering years. You don't get better suffering than that.”
Little Miss Sunshine (2006) – Uncle Frank (Steve Carell)

“The old dreams were good dreams. They didn't work out, but I’m glad I had them.”
The Bridges of Madison County (1995) – Robert Kincaid (Clint Eastwood

Six Ways to Handle the Stress of Job Uncertainty

There is a lot of talk about the job market in the news these days, from general woes about the broken economy, to state-wide crises involving job cuts, furloughs, pay cuts, etc.

If we put them side by side, our lists of top news items would probably differ some, but chances are we all are feeling the uncertainty of the time we live in.

When people are let go at work, others must pick up the work. Work once done at home but now sent out of the country leaves people in the lurch. Furloughs, reduced work hours, reorganization downsizing, it's a tough time in the work market!  

A lower paycheck is where we feel it the most. That reduced income can leave you feeling anxious, stress rises; temper flares and all of a sudden your job just may not feel as great as it once did. In fact, at time you may wish you could just quit!   Have you had those feelings?

What’s the best way to cope? How can we take care of ourselves in times of uncertainty?

Let me assure you, there is action you can take. Basic self-care is crucial now – you may need to take a break, time off, a sick day or just that vacation that you have been putting off. However, besides the importance of self-care there are other ways to lessen your stress, ease the panic and prepare yourself for the future.

It’s easy to feel worn out and stress can slow us down and we want to do nothing. But it’s better to be proactive instead of just reactive. Instead of giving up, it’s the time to get busy. Getting busy will re-energize your mind, spirit and body.

Here are six ways to handle the stress of job uncertainty.

1.   Observe. Begin to observe the opportunities around you. Be aware of what is happening in your organization as well as in other organizations. Pay less attention to gossip and inform yourself of the facts.

2.   Network. Connect with other people. Let others know what you are up to.

3.     Prepare. Get your resume updated. Be sure it looks professional, crisp and succinct.

It’s better to be prepared than to wait for the worse to happen.

4.   Explore. Sit down and write out a list of all the jobs you might be interested in. Explore what is happening in your field by going on the Internet. Branch out into related fields. What jobs really interest you?

5.   Ignite. Get back in touch with that earlier passion you had. What was it that once excited you, intrigued you, fascinated you? It’s not too late to find that job you always wanted.

6.   Wait. If you've taken the other five steps, you are prepared to advantage of opportunities that may come your way. The energy is working in your favor. Things will begin to happen. Be patient.

 

Remember – you are at choice. And that’s a great place to be. It’s up to you to help yourself, by not giving up hope, being good to yourself and being practical about the future. Trust your instincts.

 

My story of job loss

 

I remember going through a period of high stress after losing a job as a result of reorganization. It was my first job after my divorce, I had moved to a new city to take it and then, all too soon it was over. It felt like a personal disaster. I was scared and feeling pretty low. I had no idea what I would do next. But I started networking, took an inventory of my education and skills, and made a decision to look openly at any job offer that came my way, even if I had to move again to take it.

 

After about nine months I received a job offer from a company I knew very little about at the time - Habitat for Humanity International.  The offer was a direct result of the networking I had done, a referral from someone I had spoken to. It was over 2,500 miles away, connected with my passion and I took it. I traveled worldwide working with great leaders and teams in the process of collabortively building and implementing a 5 year strategic plan. I contributed a lot and I gained a lot. It was exactly the job I needed at that time. The job loss opened up possibilities that I otherwise would not have even considered. And that can happen for you as well.

 

Whatever you do, the goal is to re-empower your mind, to feel better and to get energized. Give yourself time and patience. A better day will come, and taking the steps above will help you be prepared. You’re strong and you will get through this.

Top 5 Ways to Make Your Own Sunshine

Win A Free Gift  - keep reading!

Brrrrr, it’s cold outside. During these winter days I find many mornings are overcast and foggy, and over time the days began to feel dreary to me. The rain and snow are fun for awhile, and then I just miss the sunshine. Don’t you?

It’s not long before I can start feeling a little down and depressed and I realize I need to take some action. So I began to think about what I can do to create my own sunshine. And it works, every time!

5 ways I create my own sunshine

1.    I love to use my camera to capture the winter light's reflecting. I bundle up for my walk and soon I find scenes where I can capture the light on water, on ducks, sides of buildings, rocks, trees, etc.

2.    I enjoy taking my dog down to the river. He plays like the sun is really shining. I laugh out loud just watching him race around.

3.    I love to pick up the phone and have a great conversation with one of my kids If it’s raining, I this warms my heart like sunshine.

4.    I enjoy inviting my two young grandchildren over to color or paint. It’s another way for me to experience warmth during the bleak days of winter.

5.    I like to take off to a higher altitude where I can actually find the sun shining, especially when the weather has been dreary for a long time. I take my snowshoes along and it’s a fun day of play in the winter sunshine refreshing both my body and spirit.

These simple activities help me enjoy the days of winter. And because our physical and emotional states are intrinsically linked, doing something that has a positive impact on my emotional state supports me in other ways as well.  

So remember during the winter to nurture both your mind and body for total well-being. Winter can be challenging. The bitter cold and shorter daylight hours can lead to feelings of exhaustion, lack of motivation and a general sense of dis-ease. Keeping active and exercising can benefit you physically as well as lift your spirit.

How do you create your "sunshine" during these winter days? One client shared that she recently went over to a friend's house and just had a delicious glass of wine and enjoyed a fun-filled conversation that "lighten" her day. Another person mentioned that she preserves lemons, which she uses in a few of her Moroccan dishes. The process, she says, is "like bottling sunshine." I also know people who love to spend more time during the winter reading, drawing, painting or playing the piano or other instruments.

 What do you do to make your own sunshine?

Now that I have you thinking about creating your own sunshine, tell me what you do or could do to create your own sunshine during these winter days. Write your ideas in the comment section below. It will be exciting to read the posts. We can learn from each other!

Free Gift:   I am going to give the person with the most unique response (as judged by me) a surprise gift. Share your ideas, ideas you know could work for others as well. This gift offer ends on February 15, 2010.The winner will be announced in my blog toward the end of February. Stay tuned!

Thanks in advance for sharing your "sunshine" ideas and letting us all learn more about creating our own sunshine during the winter months.

Snowstorms, Isolation and Holidays

How do you take care of yourself during the holidays – especially if alone?

The other day I found myself at 4:30pm sitting in a local restaurant – one that had working electricity -  having my first cup of Jo and hot food for the day.  The sierra foothills had a snow storm that knocked the electricity out sometime during the night and when I awoke in the morning I found I had no heat, no lights, no telephone service, no television, and no connection to the web. And my computer was fast losing its charge as I busied my morning playing scrabble and spider solitaire.  

The heavy snow kept me at home most of the day and by early afternoon I found myself feeling a little  restless, anxious (could have been the lack of caffeine!) and feeling isolated as no one I called from my cell answered their phones.  Everyone’s phones were out, including cells with run down batteries! It was an experience short lived, but with the holidays approaching it brought to mind how important it is for me to be intentional about my holiday plans so I don’t feel too alone. Being divorced and living alone has taught me to think ahead and plan how I am going to spend my time, especially if I won’t be with family. And by doing so, I have had some great holidays, even though occasionally spending them in some unusual ways.

How about you? What are your holiday plans? With the Christmas holidays just around the corner, what are you plans for the holidays? What are you doing to ensure that you experience and feel the spirit of gratitude and joy during the holidays?

Here a few things I have done in the past to make my holidays away from family fun and enjoyable.

· Fi  First Christmas alone I took my daughter’s truck and with a girlfriend to the mountains, loaded the truck bed with snow and took it to the valley and built a snowman on the front lawn to surprise my friend and her children.  My heart was full of love and laughter and my body worn out which gave me a great night’s sleep.

· W Went with a girlfriend and our dogs to a hotel by the beach (cheap), had our own lights, candles, and Christmas music and enjoyed a wonderful, but different Christmas. Wouldn’t have been the same in my home alone, that’s for sure.

· I’  I've gotten together with other people who were also doing their holidays alone. It was all rather spontaneous and we spent time listening to each other’s Christmas traditions.

· S   Served turkey at a women's shelter. I was impressed with how these women were enjoying the holiday regardless of the circumstance. Great lesson for me.

Those experiences taught me the value of being intentional about what I am going to do during the holidays to make them fun and enjoyable for myself.  The times I haven’t done this . . . well, you know that story!

This Christmas is another one that I will be spending alone (or should I say differently).  Will you?  I’d love to hear from you and the ways you have celebrated your holidays when circumstances have you spending them alone.  Post below what you have done and the lessons you learned so we can discover and learn together. Let’s make the choice to take good care of ourselves so we enjoy this coming holiday season.  Is that a deal?

   

Our next Circle of Life / Power of Focus 16 week teleclass begins March 10, 2010. Stay tuned.  We are having a great time and participants are making great progress in our current class.  We’ll share some of the stories the first of the year.

May the holidays this year bring you special joy and much sweet peace. Happy Holidays,

Marlene

Coach@marlenelockwood.com

© Copyright 2009 Marlene Lockwood All rights reserved.

Barcelona to Istanbul & Back

Announcement first this time – because I don’t want you to miss out on a great holiday special - the Circle of Life - Power of Focus Workshop begins Nov. 4th.

www.marlenelockwood.com/circleoflife-holiday.html

We all have areas of our lives that we would like to see changes or realize success. This is your opportunity to move from a “someday” to doing it “now”. I know I’m planning to make some of my dreams come true in 2010 and so are many of your peers. You can make it happen too .

Funny how time flies when you are procrastinating.  

The last blog I wrote I was in Europe on my first cruise. I’ve been back now for a month and just getting my normal pace back as well as my discipline. But now I am back in the flow!

I’m going to cut right to the chase - while I was exposed to some of the most beautiful sites what disturbs me was the pollution. I know, I know, who wants to hear about the down side.  But, I just need a little soap box time.

Our guide in Greece, who obviously was in love with his country, was concerned that in Athens people don’t like to, actually he said, "they don’t – eat fruit from their trees or food from home gardens because of the pollution."

Too many rivers in the countries I visited are polluted to the eye and people are unable to use the water, and of course not swim in what was once clear, blue water. We have the same problem with many rivers in the USA.

I have been told that the Native Americans plan 8 generations out. That sounds like wise counsel to me.

“We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors; we borrow it from our children.”
– Native American Proverb

This set heavy on my heart as I returned home. I had to ask myself: How am I taking care of my environment? 

I’m letting you know that I have committed to becoming more aware of environmental issues and ways I can create or support healthier communities – and the world!  My letting you know, it holds me more accountable!

And now for the fat cats –

These two were my favorite.

They were enjoying the sun and a nice afternoon bath laying on a ledge in lovely Barcelona, Spain - - - well cared for and fed by many!

It’s Vacation Time for Me – Yipee!

When you read this I will be in Barcelona exploring Picasso’s early artwork. I’m so excited to be on my first cruise. A 12 day Mediterranean Cruise taking us from Barcelona to Italy, Greece, Venice, Dubrovnik (Croatia), and two stops in Turkey – Ephesus and Istanbul.  We are arriving a few days early to explore Barcelona.

So this week’s blog is short and sweet.  I’m gathering wonderful stories for the future!

À bientôt , ardillita, arrivederci, Ciao, Yasou – on second thought, I better just smile and bow my head!

Will try and keep you posted on a few great places!Till later – Marlene

Coach@marlenelockwood.com

© Copyright 2009 Marlene Lockwood All rights reserved.

 ____________________________________________________________________________

Look what’s coming on Nov 4, 2009 – We are very excited!

Circle of Life ™ Teleclass Series: The Power of Focus: using the energy of change to move you toward your dreams

Open to anyone who wants to "turn it around!"

The good news… is that change and chaos create energy - energy that can be used to refocus your life, energy that promotes creativity and possibilities and which can help you refocus your life.

Consider these questions:

Do you feel stuck in your personal or professional life?  
                                                                            
Are you confronted with a future that feels too uncertain?
                                                                                                          
Are you wondering if “this is it”? If you need to settle for “just getting by”?

Take a minute to Imagine . . .

• Living a balanced life: work, self-care, relationships, play, finances, family
  

• Reducing your stress and energizing yourself with simple self-care practices
  

• Navigating major life choices in a focused, healthy and supported way

• Utilizing your strengths more effectively

Co-coached by Ulrika Brattemark & Marlene Lockwood

In this 16 week teleclass we will be using a proven approach to life enrichment where you will be supported to move beyond your fears and limitations toward living a life that is truly rich and meaningful to you. You can turn it around.  Now is the time.   This teleclass includes the following features:

Watch for more information COMING on my blog, Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn

Marlene Lockwood focuses much of her coaching time working with women who are rebuilding their lives after the end of a love relationship. She supports them in navigating life transitions with more ease, to improve their life balance, and increase their creativity and vitality. They become in tune with their heart’s desire and become eager to leap solo into their new amazing life. Marlene is a certified Facilitator and Health and Wellness Coach, qualified Myers/Briggs Assessment provider, and serves as faculty and mentor for Institute Cultural Affairs. She received her BSN from CSUS, and her MPA from the USF.    
www.marlenelockwood.com

Ulrika Brattemark works with individuals and groups to support them in creating the life they deeply desire.  She is committed to helping others discover what is truly meaningful to them, cultivating their personal strengths and uniqueness, and to create and sustain positive change in their life.  Ulrika is a certified Health and Wellness Coach who continuously furthers her coaching expertise by attending advanced workshops, retreats, and courses in multiple Mind/Body topics such as Stress Management, Communication skills, Yoga, and Creativity. coachulrika@gmail.com

Can We Turn it Around?

I was sitting in the nuclear medicine waiting room of a local hospital while my daughter was having a thyroid scan. This was her annual check after a cancer scare three years ago. (We’ll hear results next week – we expect good things.) In the waiting room were three members of another family who were also waiting for their family member.

As happens now days while we waited the four of us began to discuss the challenging times we live in:economics, peace, environment etc. You know the simple subjects. Had we had more time I’m sure we would have gotten to religion! While we were all around the same age (older boomers) we were split on whether or not we (globally speaking) could turn things around for our country or our world.

A woman and I felt part of the solutions lied with each of us being responsible and doing our part. If everyone would do their part, we offered, we could make a big difference . . .  think global, act local . . . perhaps an old way of thinking.  Another gentleman’s position was that nothing we had done had worked and nothing we will do will work either . . . a disturbing point of view indeed. He felt our generation were consumers and spoiled, which we probably are, and that we were not likely to come up with any viable, creative solutions that would get the job done.

We accepted that to some degree we were both right, a polite thing to do in such circumstances. However, the women and I felt that we were at a pivotal point in history; a time when history has shown dramatic things can happen. But how? Could it be the next generation, we wondered?  Was the thinking of the next generation different enough, creative enough, blue sky enough, crazy enough to come up with solutions not yet conceived? Some of us felt it was, others not. 

As we all prepared to leave we wished each other well, and I left with my mind full of disturbing and challenging thoughts. Then I read an article in Psychology Today, October 2009 issue about Solutions and a company named Zappos, an online retail company located in Las Vegas best known for its array of shoes and its free shipping. A big smile came over my face as I read the article. A box insert showing the culture clash between Zappos’s thinking and a Typical Company’s thinking gave me some renewed hope.

CULTURE CLASH ZAPPOS                                                                 TYPICAL COMPANY
STANDARD INTERVIEW QUESTIONS
How weird are you?	What are your strengths and weaknesses?
HIRING BONUS
New hires are offered $2,000 to refuse the job and go away.  Those who stay (about 96%) are more committed and engaged thereafter.	Actual hiring bonus, which makes it hard to say “no” to a place where one may not belong. (or these days – no bonus)
ATMOSPHERE
Themed conference rooms including “Zen,” ‘beach” and “superheroes.”	Fluorescent lights, white walls.
CUSTOMER SERVICE
Phone reps are trusted to connect with customers however they see fit.	Phone reps follow scripts, fill out call logs, and adhere to time limits.
MISSION
CEO Hsieh wants employees to move from having a job to “having a vocation.”	Make money, get employees to work harder

In a little over 10 years Zappos is raking in $1billion worth of annual gross sales as of 2008 and employees report that their work is exciting and challenging. This is supported by a low turnover rate and by company surveys. Something must be right. Employees report that they are inspired and allowed to express their own individuality.

These kinds of articles encourage me – and inspire me. I want to shout, we can make a difference! We can turn things around! What do you think?

Coach@marlenelockwood.com

© Copyright 2009 Marlene Lockwood All rights reserved.

ANNOUNCEMENT: coming Nov. 2009 –
open to anyone wanting to “turn it around!”  

Circle of Life™ Teleclass series:

The Power of Focus
using the energy of change to move toward your dreams

Consider these questions:

Do you feel stuck in your personal or professional life?                                                                                

Are you confronted with a future that feels too uncertain?
                                                                                                        
Are you wondering if “this is it”? If you need to settle for “just getting by”?

Take a minute to Imagine . . .

• Living a balanced life: work, self-care, relationships, play, finances, family

• Reducing your stress and energizing yourself with simple self-care practices

• Navigating major life choices in a focused, healthy and supported way

• Utilizing your strengths more effectively

The good news... is that change and chaos create energy - energy that can be used to refocus your life, energy that promotes creativity and possibilities and which can help you refocus your life.

Co-coached by Ulrika Brattemark and Marlene Lockwood

In this 16 week teleclass we will be using a proven approach to life enrichment where you will be supported to move beyond your fears and limitations toward living a life that is truly rich and meaningful to you. You can turn it around. Now is the time. This teleclass includes the following features:

 

Watch for more information on my eZine, blog and on Twitter, Face Book and Linkedin.

Marlene Lockwood focuses much of her coaching time working with women who are rebuilding their lives after the end of a love relationship. She supports them in navigating life transitions with more ease, to improve their life balance, and increase their creativity and vitality. They become in tune with their heart’s desire and become eager to leap solo into their new amazing life. Marlene is a certified Facilitator and Health and Wellness Coach, qualified Myers/Briggs Assessment provider, and serves as faculty for Institute Cultural Affairs. She received her BSN from CSUS, and her MPA from the USF.     

www.marlenelockwood.com

The Power of Accepting Loss

 

Sometimes the word surrender can rub us the wrong way. But I would like you to consider the word surrender in terms of acceptance and its power to help us heal after a loss. Time Magazine reports that it typically takes people 5-8 years to recover from a heartbreaking loss. But there are quicker ways.

When you surrender to or accept the loss you have experienced your body is put in a clearer healing state. You are no longer fighting back and using your energy to resist but instead, in surrender your energies are directed to the process of grieving. Grieving is nature’s healing remedy. It is a miraculous healing potion. 

When an emotional injury takes place, the body begins a process as natural as the healing of a physical wound.  Let the process happen.  Trust the process. Surrender to it.” Colgrove, Bloomfield & McWilliams.

Surrender brings acceptance of the loss and leads you into the significant work of grieving. Grieving can take some people longer than others.  This is not a time to compare, or think your grieving process needs to look like someone else’s.  Your grieving will take the time and form necessary for you. But also know that to a large degree, grieving will take the time you let it. Time Magazine’s report can be reduced considerably when we allow the body to do the work it knows it needs to do to heal and be healthy. With the right coaching and support this time can be reduced considerably.

Acknowledging your loss is the most important step you will take.  Because it will move you through loss and into acceptance which will steadily take you into your new life.  And the big bonus? You are much more likely to arrive in better health! Sometimes your Mind needs to hear straight talk. Tell yourself, “It has happened. It is real. It did happen to me.”  Say it until you believe it in the very cells of your body. Our minds can be tricky. We need to be reminded that it is true, we have lost that love.  If you wonder if you are strong enough, know that you are. You are alive. You will survive.

This period of pain and grieving is difficult but it is the first step we must take to get our life back. Your life at this point may not yet have a clear future. The important thing to know is that you will survive. You can make it. You will feel better, no doubt about it.

Coach@marlenelockwood.com

©Copyright 2009 Marlene Lockwood. All rights reserved.

Coming on November 4, 2009,
the Circle of Life Teleclass.

I would like to ask you a question.

What if you could experience the world slowing down, find the clarity and purpose you are looking for in your personal or professional life, and focus on your own self-care?

In just 16 weeks you can be well on your way to living your life on purpose, you will learn effective tools you can use immediately and also in the future when you encounter challenging times, and overall you find yourself enjoying a more balanced and fulfilled life.

Yes it’s true.  We’ll be sharing more information in the coming weeks.

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Marlene Lockwood focuses much of her coaching time working with women who are rebuilding their lives after the end of a love relationship.  She supports them in navigating life transitions with more ease, to improve their life balance, and increase their creativity and vitality. They become in tune with their heart’s desire and become eager to leap solo into their new amazing life.  Marlene is a certified Facilitator and Health and Wellness Coach, qualified Myers/Briggs Assessment provider, and serves as faculty for Institute Cultural Affairs. She received her BSN from CSUS, and her MPA from the USF.